Two and a half years. I never deleted the blog, but yet, no posts. That's a long time for me to be quiet!
I regret that now, but can't go back. Not quite sure why I stopped posting back in 2007. Not for lack of content, concerns, questions, etc. But to put those things into words... that part was harder. And just the adoption process itself was terribly difficult. I didn't realize how painful it would be to wait. So many fears, concerns.
Our kids did come home, but much later than expected. It wasn't until Spring 2008 when we first saw AJ and Helen's sweet faces in person. Still, that was over two years ago. So much was happening! Keeping up on my personal blog fell by the wayside, this anonymous one long since forgotten. Heck, we even adopted again in the meantime.
Much has changed in two years.
And yet, still so much to express. Swirling thoughts, concerns, joys and sadness about this topic. Now that I am living it, some fears have been realized, most have stayed dormant. New concerns have taken the place of old.
The sad truth is that even two and half years later, far too many kids are still waiting. Waiting with hope - maybe waiting in vain - for a family. Two and half years later, the roadblocks are slowly falling away (goodbye waiver in January 2010!) but there is still much fear, much ignorance... and although you can google "HIV" and read piles of information and data 'til the cows come home, it's not quite the same getting inside someone's head - someone who is living with it day-to-day.
My head might be a scary place, but I'm willing to open it up if it would help even one family consider being open to adopting an HIV+ child.
I'm back. I'll try to do better. :)